finishing

I just can't get my mind to focus somehow. I've been sitting up on this bed with the lappie in my face for the whole day attempting to study and almost nothing but the word 'fuck this!' is resonating in my head. Haven't been in the best of moods these days but I guess it'll pass. Guess I ain't mature enough to deal with petty problems such as exams and stuff, but yes, my mle paper has seriously screwed my mood up. Its not like the kinda paper where I fared badly cause the paper was hard, its more of the kinda paper where I knew I could've done so much freaking better but I just didnt. I'll be judged by the results nonetheless. Bloody hell. I hate being misjudged. But then again, the actual results ain't out.

Well I just wanted to let that out so that I finally could (maybe) study with a clear mind. The content of the work ain't helping much though. This is the Last time, i'm ever gonna take a history module Ever and ever and ever and ever and ever and ever. You suck vinny. hahaha.

I'm just looking at things so differently now. Almost everything of my previous perceptions have changed. Is the process always like that? I know that I ain't a cynic but sometimes, as things have turned out, there is no escaping the truth. In every aspect, I detest to this present. I could say stuff like 'I told you so' or 'shit you were right' but well that doesn't matter at all does it? Why couldn't some things just go with the flow without any complications. I guess thats how the road twists and turns. If I could I would hit the restart..

Then again, even if i could, that wouldn't make much of a difference. I told my friend that day, "most of the time, its either you got it or you don't." well I guess this could apply to me as well. No point chasing cars. Well I have said that many times before. Not sure if i have followed. Take a chance, I did.

I wanna catch up with my past.

Didnt they say that life has their ups and downs? and that happiness and sadness comes in a pair? I'm just waiting for the tide to turn

sʞɔnsǝɟıl

˙˙˙˙op uoƃ ı sı poʍ ˙ʎpɹol ɥo ˙dn ʇɥƃıɹ ʞɔɐq ǝɯ uʍd oʇ ɯǝɥɔ puɐ ɥʇɐɯ ɹoɟ ʍou ɐɥɐɥɐɥ ˙uʍop ǝpısdn ǝɯ pǝuʍo sɔısʎɥd

(:

Baby, take off your cool
I wanna see you, I wanna see you
Baby, don't be so cool
I wanna see you, I wanna see you

Baby, take off your cool
I want to get to know you

happiness

It rained today ;)

Today, for the rarest record, everyone I have met or talked to today is happy. Like seriously everyone. I'd like to savor this day forever hope for another one of these to come. 

I like to believe happiness is contagious. Hope that i've been spreading the germ around like you all have been today. haha 

Oh and mom thought I got a tattoo on my left arm. lol

Cheers my friends

1/8

Last day of school was freaking fantastic. Walking on the pavement along the grass patch beside LT11 was nostalgic. So short yet full of memories. Last day of many sweet ones to come ahead man.

Btw, I ain't really that much of an optimist. I'll only say stuff which I know has full capability of happening. Giving false hope just urks me. I just hate painting stuff in dark colors. I'm serious.

Study mode - On.

Weaknesses

Ignorance is not the case. Fully aware of it, it seems. Why fall then when the danger is known? Stand up, jump over or move on. Do something about it. Its not that you can't, you know that. Stop wasting so much time with things you cannot change. 

 

My hands are stretched for everyone, thats the furthest I can go. Grab them if you want to. Grab them if you dare. I'll pull you up cause I can. However, the rest is up to you. 

Oh... I guess I could kick your butt to move :)

Lets get going everyone. The battle has barely started. Brace up yo.

4am

The sound was deafening and it was pouring. Flashes of white blinding light streaked across the sky that night. The sky roared like it was going to war with the land. Somehow, I was not taken aback or scared by it. I opened the window, looked up in the sky as a lightning bolt cracked the black pane of the night sky. As the thunder came booming, I closed my eyes and took a deep breathe.

The rain smells good.

thanks to You.

Is it Me?

I might not be understanding enough. Many things in this world which I find hard to understand. Maybe I just don't have it in me to understand? Understanding to me comes as a choice. I usually want to be understood by my close ones and choose not to be for some others. I don't know how it may work for other individuals, where understanding can be obtained from just pure presence. I'd agree with that to a certain extent, but I still think that a little effort would curb that. I don't think any individual would not be understood if he or she really wanted to be understood. Never fully, but just enough. Question comes again whether one is seeking to be understood or not. That, I feel, is completely Your choice. Its You.

I think

it may not seem so,

but I think you are matured, girl..

Let it fall

Raindrops keep fallin' on my head

And just like the guy whose feet are too big for his bed

Nothin' seems to fit

Those raindrops are fallin' on my head, they keep fallin'

So I just did me some talkin' to the sun

And I said I didn't like the way he got things done

Sleepin' on the job

Those raindrops are fallin' on my head, they keep fallin'

But there's one thing I know

The blues they send to meet me won't defeat me

It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me

Raindrops keep fallin' on my head

But that doesn't mean my eyes will soon be turnin' red

Cryin's not for me

'Cause I'm never gonna stop the rain by complainin'

Because I'm free

Nothin's worryin' me

It won't be long till happiness steps up to greet me

Overslept

overslept on my way back home on the bus..

My studies have not seem to be bothering me for quite awhile. The threat meter has been slowly inching its way up however.. Hmm. guess its time I put my priorities right and get more work done. Studying seems a tad much easier anyway..

I raged. Felt so much anger and hate for that moment as I reflected on the situation to see who and what was the problem. Yes I was blinded by the rage to see things from a fair point of view. I see it now however. Nonetheless, there is still a major fault and hatred I could harbor. Forgive but never forget? hell yes I wanted that. But it would be completely useless if things ended as such while seeing the situation in a calm state I am in now. Forgive and forget. Yes I will. The thing ends here. I'll show you...

I want to put this load off my back now. I might or might not pick it up. but i'll have to throw it on the floor now. If not, I will fall off my feet. That, is not an option.

Yesterday

Yesterday I ate a slice of Raspberry Cheese cake at 3 am at night that was heavenly. Everyone should try that cheese cake from secret recipe! its just too yummy to miss out!

Yesterday I did my math tutorial 7 when my teacher is at tutorial 9. zzzzomg i'm freakin behind time.

Yesterday I played guitar heroes till my fingers trembled.

Yesterday, cheryl was helllllllll funny. PAD yo yo. ;)

Yesterday I celebrated constance's Birthday! hahah sorry cons for the lousy present :S but I sure hope you had a good 21st birthday yeah (:

Yesterday I sat BKs old Volkswagen Beetle!!! what a ride. freaking cute car i'd say. :D

Yesterday felt good somehow or rather..

Oh, i believe in yesterday..